thoughts of an aspie

TOAA Reflections Giving the Gifts That Matter By Melissa K. Vassar-Belloso For most holidays we celebrate as people there are rituals associated with them such as eating food or giving gifts. Over the years giving gifts has risen from being part of Christmas to perhaps the most prominent part of it.Christmas is not only one of the most profitable commercially…

TOAA Reflections Understanding Guilt and Healing Through Selfishness By Melissa K. Vassar-Belloso I woke up this morning with a flurry of ideas and I had to write another reflection. I think short of being a little behind on my creative work this week, I’ve been even more behind on self-care. When we’re dealing with stress and abuse, especially at the…

TOAA Reflections Shouldn’t a Person’s Best be Good Enough? By Melissa K. Vassar-Belloso Growing up I was more or less forcibly raised into the Catholic church and given the idea that the holidays were about peace and love. I remember seeing everything from images on cards to families in movies having wonderful holidays where people worked together and parents doted…

Conversations are part of everyday life but we’ve perhaps all experienced being at a loss for words. There are many different reasons we might run into that loss for words. Sometimes we aren’t sure how to respond or can’t find the right words, but sometimes it’s not a matter of choice. Selective mutism is perhaps a condition you’ve never heard…

As we grow from children into adults, there are certain milestones in our lives that signify healthy development. Maybe you remember learning to swim,ride a bike or write your name. Maybe you remember learning to play sports. Maybe you just like being able to walk and eat  at the same time without falling on your face. These are all thanks…

TOAA Reflections What it Means to be Part of a Support Network By Melissa K. Vassar-Belloso In a continuation of considering recent events in my life, I’ve been trying to make an effort to try to understand some of the viewpoints of the people around me. My mother recently told me that my recent tough spots were toxic to her…

TOAA Reflections Is There Really a “Right” and “Wrong”? By Melissa K. Vassar-Belloso I felt like starting today off with a little reflection. I actually have a bit of a headache but my mind feels active today. Maybe that means I’ll accomplish some things today. Recently I’ve been trying to make more efforts to try and learn more about communication…

TOAA Reflections Are Negative Emotions Necessary to Heal? By Melissa K. Vassar-Belloso So I know I’ve been reflecting a lot lately. Part of that is adjusting to a new medication but part of it is really starting to have to deal with the emotional roller coaster of healing from some personal relationships I’ve had to come to terms with. You…

TOAA Reflections How a Photobooth and a Phone Call Saved my Life By Melissa K. Vassar-Belloso Today is an amazing day. It’s Halloween and on this day two years ago I stood in a courthouse and did the one thing I never thought I would do. I got married. Now you may not think getting married is amazing, but far…

TOAA Reflections The Problems With How Our Society Treats Abuse Victims By Melissa K. Vassar-Belloso So a little while ago I did another reflection called “Why is it Always my Fault?” in response to an incident with my parents and it got me thinking about something. One of the reasons it got me thinking is that I realized it was…