TOAA Reflections
Finding Resolve in a New Year
By Melissa K. Vassar-Belloso
It’s been a while since I’ve written anything. I am still going to get back to regular blogs soon but I wanted to warm up a little with a good reflection. I hope everyone is having a good year so far. Now you might be wondering how relevant it is to write about resolutions the second month into the year. The long answer is that I wanted to post a reflection on that in January and never got a chance but the short answer is that February is one of the most common months for a person to have either forgotten,failed at or given up on their New Year’s resolutions.
To be perfectly honest, I’ve never been that engrossed into holidays. It may be partially because I can’t wrap my mind around all the social muck that comes with them. New Year’s is one of those things that is particularly confusing to me because to me I interpret it as a very blown up celebration of time passing. On the flip side, society seems to treat it as a sort of soft reset and I think that’s where the tradition of making a resolution comes in. I honestly think the same thing about resolutions at New Year’s as I do about Lenten sacrifices. They seem like nothing more than arbitrary pork on an already arbitrary event. It has about the same significance as buying a Secret Santa gift after getting peer pressured into participation or giving a valentine to every child in class because you have to.
But please don’t get the wrong idea. I think holidays are fine and I think if they add something your life or make you happy then you should engage in them. What puzzles me quite often is how much of our holiday “traditions” are just done because we feel obligated to do them. The idea of making a resolution and bettering yourself as a person isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Goal setting and changing as a person is always a good thing. What bothers me is an implied societal pressure to do so and why this practice is isolated to a specific time of the year. If something is bothering you about yourself or where you are in life, why not just make that commitment then? What’s the significance of doing it when the year rolls over?
I believe there’s a popular quote that says something about not waiting around for the right time because the right time is now. That philosophy makes more sense to me. Betterment shouldn’t have a limit to it and it shouldn’t be forced. If you want to change your diet,learn a new skill or follow your dreams then you don’t need to wait for a big sequin ball to drop. Do it now! Change happens on your terms.
But if you’ve already failed or given up on the resolution you did make, there’s no need to fret. If that goal means something to you then go for it again and work until you get it. Don’t wait until 2020 to cultivate your sense of resolve because there’s no time requirement on living life to the fullest.There are no resets and there is no perfect time. But whether you make one resolution or 100 resolutions, remember to stick to them. They should be things that mean something to you and things you truly want. No person or holiday can dictate how may steps you take in life and when you take them.
Thanks for reading this issue of Thoughts of an Aspie!
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